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Whether you want to play the field, stay totally single, or find your next love, all that matters is that you’re making empowered, healthy choices — and putting yourself and your happiness first, always.We all continue dating because we’re convinced there’s Mr. Right just around the corner – but years of dating can occasionally leave us a little jaded.But it’s important to focus on other parts of your life post-breakup, not just finding a replacement partner.“Be open to having hobbies, making new friends, and NOT focusing solely on dating,” Stef Safran, Chicago-based matchmaker at Stef and the City, tells Bustle.“The best thing people can do when they start dating again is to really lean into the awesomeness of who they are and then show their truest self to their dates,” Bergman says.
Be unabashedly yourself on dates — because you’re never going to find your true match if you’re not being authentic.“Take your time getting back out there, don’t feel rushed to disclose the fact that you’ve experienced a recent breakup and don’t try to progress a relationship too quickly,” Ebert says.“Pace yourself, play the field and have fun.” Once you take the leap and download a dating app or ask your pals to hook you up with their single friends, you might be tempted to go into dating overdrive.“It usually means you’re feeling brave enough to risk being brokenhearted.It’s normal to feel ready one day and not ready the next. Sometimes we need to lean into the fear instead of allowing it to dictate the direction of our lives.” After experiencing heartbreak, it’s not uncommon to be afraid to start dating again, because it can feel like you’re signing yourself up to get hurt all over again in the future.
“You may have unrealistic expectations as to what you want in a partner or how long it may take to find someone you want to date,” Davida Rappaport, speaker, spiritual counselor, and dating expert, tells Bustle. “Avoid talking about your ex-partner on dates or tell[ing] your dates how much you have been hurt or the reason you broke up with your ex,” Rappaport says.